Sunday, January 22, 2012

What I write about

Lately, I've noticed that the underlying themes of my stories is changing a little.

The first several novels I wrote dealt with the following kinds of themes:

  • What happens when a character's life implodes without warning
  • Dealing with the death or disablement of a parent
  • Dealing with divorce 
  • Dealing with an empty nest
  • Falling in or out of love at an inconvenient time and/or with an inconvenient partner
In my last couple of stories some new theme have emerged:
  • Dreaming a new Dream
  • Living life according to your own rules
  • Rubbing up against social norms
It's pretty clear to me by now that my main audience for my stories is my conscious mind. Since my uptight, rule-bound waking self too-often ignores and/or dismisses the longings of my heart, my subconscious has found an interesting route for communicating with me. I have always known that my novels somehow tracked along with my life. In many ways, some of them have been kind of wordy versions of the game of "what if".

I've gone threw a season when my life became upended, smashed and scattered at my feet. I have dealt with it better than I thought I could. (Thanks to the stories that I wrote just before and during that period, along with the support of friends.)  Now, I seem to be ready to put Humpty back together again. In order to do that I have to figure out what kind of person I want to be in the these last seasons of my life.

First and foremost, I already have embraced the title of Author. Finally. After avoiding it for decades, I've seized it, claimed it and owned it as something that should have belonged to me for a long time, but for the paralyzing combination of fear and stubbornness. Whatever else I do, I will write.

I also seem to be playing with the idea of accepting the fact that I play by my own rules. I have always behaved in a very conventional and even somewhat conservative manner. I was the stereotypical Good Girl from the outside, but I have always been totally free in my intellectual and spiritual contemplation.  I'm rethinking some of that. I find myself less and less likely to behave in the "conventional" manner for the sake of appearances or to keep other people happy. I want to be one of those old ladies that make people smile behind their hands.

My writing is guiding me in a new direction where I will dream new dreams and try a new way of living.

Let's see where that goes, shall we?

No comments:

Post a Comment